I am an introvert (surprise!).
So when there is trouble in my life, I tend to turn inward. I withdraw from family, friends, and, truthfully, God. I clam up, even when friends and family try to draw me out to try to help. I distract myself with TV and work so I don't have deal with what trouble is in my path.
Lately, there has been trouble, but the specifics aren't important here, the bottom line is-I have withdrawn.
By withdrawing and moving further from my Heavenly Father I wonder-what has He tried to tell me and I haven't been listening? What has He tried to show me that I have not seen?
In my darkest moments, I have felt alone, ashamed, worthless, and hopeless. I have heard the lies of the enemy and I have believed them. The only way that is possible is that I have pulled away from the Lord so far that Satan's voice has become louder to me than my Heavenly Father's.
But I have hope. I have a dear and wonderful husband who cares deeply for me and my well-being, physical, emotional and spiritual. I have good friends who are willing to take my late-night, nervous breakdown phone calls. I have community for what feels like the first time in my life that has wrapped their love around our family like a warm blanket.
And I have God's promises:
The bottom line here is, I need Jesus. When I am not actively pursuing my relationship with Him, when I am pushing away instead of pressing in, I am not following the path the Lord has laid before me.
Friends, press in, don't push away. You will always find exactly what you need in His word and through a healthy prayer life with the Lord.
Blessings,
Meri
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