Five years ago this past November (right around Thanksgiving), I suffered a miscarriage. I was about 12 weeks pregnant, we had seen our sweet baby on ultrasound and were excited to add a new member to our family. And then I started to bleed and eventually I lost the baby.
I was heartbroken. I was devastated. I was lost.
I did not understand why God had allowed this pain in my life-I could see no good coming from this, only pain and heartache.
At the end of 2015, I joined the Prayer Ministry Team at Thrive Moms which is a wonderful Christian resource for moms in all stages of life and motherhood.
This week I was on the "team" to answer the prayer requests that come in via e-mail and one caught my eye. A mother of 4 was pregnant with her 5th child, but was having complications. Over the course of a few days we communicated back and forth and I prayed continuously for her, her family, and her unborn child.
Today she e-mailed me to let me know she had lost the baby.
My heart broke. It hurt almost as much as when I lost my own sweet baby in 2010. I responded with some words of encouragement and my phone number so she could call if she needed to talk.
And then I saw it. I saw the purpose in the pain. I saw God's plan laid out beautifully in front of me. Had I never had a child born into Heaven's nursery, I would not have been able to connect to this mother on the same level. I would not be able to share my story with her so that she would know she is not alone in her grief and it is okay to grieve. I would not have been able to tell her the pain will never go away, but it will get easier and she will learn to live life with joy again. I would not have had the opportunity to tell her she needs to give herself time to grieve and it is okay to be sad and angry and all of those things we go through when confronted with death and loss.
I feel privileged to be able to witness God's work in this manner and to be used for His purpose.